Cardella and the Green Boys

Writers: Len, Ames
Date Posted: 8th March 2011

Characters: G'wen, T'bel, Cardella
Description: Cardella talks with T'bel and G'wen about her relationship
Location: Dolphin Cove Weyr
Date: month 13, day 14 of Turn 5
Notes: Follows 'Green Weyrlings Heart to Heart'

Cardella

The tiny bronze flit sqwacked as T'bel sat down at one of the corner
tables in the dinning room. He would have told Fanth to tell Neath
where G'wen and his friend could look for him, but he figured his
baby lizard's protests would help the two Weyrlings to find him easily.
Sure enough, he soon saw two tiny figures walking his way,
their heads close in conversation. When they got closer, his
weyrmate's child smiled and reached out to pet the young flit.

"Hello G'wen, Cardella." T'bel stood up to hold out a chair to the
pretty girl, before sitting back down and throwing some meat to the
flit. "Don't mind him, if we keep throwing him food, he'll shut up.
So, what can I do for you two? Fanth made it sound urgent. Something
up with your greens?"

Eyeing Cardella, G'wen spoke up. "No, it's not that. It's something
you said..or rather..some things you said and suggested to Cardella."
He pointily looked to her to continue.

She didn't want to talk about it now. Looking at T'bel, she knew she
wouldn't like what she heard and just that thought made Cardella's
insides feel like someone had twisted them into knots.

"It's nothing, really. Maybe we should forget about it all," she tried
to sound like she meant what she said, but she knew it came out a bit
weak.

"Hmm, girl it doesn't look like nothing," T'bel said, half playing
with the tiny bronze and half watching her. "Shards knows I say and
do a lot of things that upset that one there," and he pointed his chin
at G'wen, "so Fanath knows I could have done something to upset you.
Now cough it up girl, and don't worry, I don't bite."

"Much," G'wen pipped in, hoping to lighten the mood a bit.

She sighed, knowing she was stuck now. She tossed a look at G'wen to
let him know this was _not_ what she had expected. "It's just awhile
back we got to talking about, well," she paused, "J'nev, and then I've
been hearing more things lately, and well, I asked G'wen his thoughts
and he mentioned something about you and, I just don't know what to
think anymore." She sighed and shrugged her shoulders.

T'bel echoed her sigh. "Have you talked to J'nev about how you feel?
Or Aileyan like I had suggested?"

"I haven't spoken to either one," she replied. "But I keep hearing
talk about J'nev. I've been meaning to find Aileyan, I just haven't
had the chance." She didn't want him to think she hadn't taken his
advice seriously.

"Well...what sort of things have you been hearing about him? And, I
dunno, but do you think we're all mad and J'nev is a wonderful man?"
G'wen acted like he wanted to say something, but T'bel gave him a
stern look before continuing. "And too, what do you know about J'nev?
about his past, where he's from, his family, anything like that."

She blinked and stared at T'bel for a moment. The questions and the
tone behind some of them left her feeling a bit stunned.

"I..." she stammered, wondering why she'd started this whole
conversation in the first place, "I don't know all that much. He was
kind to me and we spent a lot of time together. He was kind to me," she
repeated. She knew it wasn't much, but in the past when people had
been kind she'd trusted them, given them the benefit of the doubt. It
was hard for her to think that her trust had been misplaced.

He placed his hand over her's and turned to G'wen. "Dear, make
yourself useful and go get this girl a cup of Klah. Better yet, get
us all some, we could all use it."

He patted her hand whilst he watched the young man walk across the
dinning hall. "He's a sweet boy, I'm glad you two are friends," he
said to her, smiling in a pensive way. "Okay, sweetie, I'm not going
to say things you're not ready to hear, understood? I understand that
he was kind to you. Trust me, I understand that. What I want to know
is, do you know much about him? Has he said anything about his
family, or his interrests, asperations, that sort of thing? I mean,
between G'wen's father and me, we talk all the time together. He
knows what I'm thinking before I know myself, and I know all about him
and his past. Between you and me, I know more about G'wen's father
than he does. But that's what a relationship is all about. So my
question is: do you know those sort of things about J'nev and if
not,then have you wondered why?"

She frowned and felt the urge to cry, even though T'bel was trying to
be gentle. She realized what he spoke of was true.

"I don't really know much about him at all. We spent a lot of time,
well, doing other things, and he made me feel good and I thought
that's what it meant to love someone?" Her tone held a question in it
as she looked up imploringly into his eyes. "We haven't talked about
those things at all. I guess, well, I guess I hardly know him." Her
frown deepened at that thought and she had to swallow a bit forceably
past the lump in her throat.

"Ah sweetheart, that's not love." He felt like crying then and there
too. "That's lust. And hey, that's okay...as long as you know that's
what it is. Don't confuse the two and you'll be okay. You haven't
told him you love him or anything like that, have you?"

Cardella's face sorta scrunched up and she pursed her lips in an
effort not to cry. She stifled a bit of a sob and only nodded in
response to his question. **I'm so confused.** She felt like someone
was squeezing her heart insider her chest. Had she been so wrong all
along? Why hadn't her mother ever talked of love to her before? Now
look what had happened!

T'bel jumped up and came around to wrap her up in his arms. "It's okay sweetie, go ahead and cry. We've all been there before." Thank the shell it was a quiet afternoon in here. No one was close to where they were sitting. "It's better for Awenth if you get it out and cry. You're holding a lot more stress for her if you try and hold things in." He could feel more than a few tears behind his own eyes and could see little G'wen looking miserble as he sat down beside them.

She sniffled and swallowed and would have held herself together had T'bel not wrapped her in his arms like her mother would have. Leaning into his shirt, she let the tears fall. Why had she come here in the first place? Life was so much simpler before she agreed to all this! "I...I don't know what to do. I don't understand," she managed to gasp out between the sobs that she could hold back no longer.

"Don't do anything until you_do_understand." T'bel stroked her back whilst she cried. "Do you want to know what J'nev is like to other people? Or would you rather want to just talk to him yourself?"

She only nodded into his shoulder as she tried to make herself stop. "Tell me," she manged to say while she reached a hand up to swipe at the foolish tears that rolled down her cheeks. She wanted to understand, _needed_ to understand what she had gotten herself into.

"Well, here, have this first." He placed the cup of klah in her hands, glad to see that G'wen had the wits about him to make it as strong as it could be. Shards knew the girl needed it. Waiting for her to take a few swallows of the stuff, he said, "to be completely honest, when he first showed up here, he was fine. Just seemed to be another boy happy to be a candidate. And then he found out not only did he actually have a half sister, but that his bronze was her queen's hatchling." He paused to take a drink of his klah as well.

"Now, that in and of itself is okay to make a boy upset. But it's like not only did that seem to make him think he could lash out, but it was that he just lashed out at whoever was around, with no provocation. He was arrogant to the Weyrlingmasters when he was a Weyrling, and there were rumours about him being rude to fellow riders. And some of the things he 'hinted' around to Aileyan, it's just not acceptable. And the tripping of me, all that happened was I knocked over a drink on the tray he was holding, to get him to shut the bloody shards up, and once again--like he does with most situations--he overreacted and tripped me up. Sweetie, the games he's playing...I wish I knew why or honestly knew how to help him, but...I dunno." He squeezed her hand. "But no matter, whatever his reasons are, he's no right to play you, understand?"

She had stopped the tears but still sniffled a bit as an after effect. What T'bel told her about J'nev didn't seem at _all_ like the person she had gotten to know. Had she been so eager for friendship and companionship that she had somehow overlooked things in him that she otherwise should have seen? She honestly didn't know the answer to that, but she knew she would _have_ to talk to him soon. Cardella nodded in response to T'bel's last words, not really able to find any words of her own at the moment.

Seeing the look on her face, T'bel pushed the rest of the klah on her. "Here, you need this more than us. So m'dear, what you need to do is decide where you want this relationship to go, if you still want it._And_you need to open your eyes a bit when it comes to men and decide_for yourself_what you want and not what some man wants of you. And this isn't just in the Weyrs; there's plenty of arses in the Holds that would take the same advantage of a girl as well. This goes for you too, G'wen, both of you don't let any man come along and talk pretty words to you and take what he wants from you. You were both chosen by two very headstrong greens and that was for a reason. So both of you prove yourself worthy of Awenth and Neath."

Cardella only nodded her response. Her mind was whirling. She had so much to think about now, she didn't even know where to begin. **Why can't life be easier?** She wondered as she drank the klah almost without tasting it.

T'bel eyed both children and sighed. Thank the shell he wasn't a youngling anymore. Such emotions! And for so little. The little flit on front of him swaked and reached out to swat his hand. "Hey! Stop it, you!" Fed up with the whole day, he pushed the bronze to G'wen. "Here, keep feeding him. He was suppost to be yours anyway, ungrateful thing."

"Who, me or the flit?"

"Both of you." He briefly squeezed the boy's hand when G'wen reached out to pet the bronze. If anything ever happened to him...T'bel was just grateful that G'wen's 'friend' was more causal and gentle than J'nev. Poor Cardella. He rubbed his forehead, feeling a nasty headache coming on. Well, there was nothing to it, he and some of the other greenriders were just going to have to take her under their wings, so to speak, and help her to get a tougher skin. If she was going to live the rest of her life around bronze riders, she was going to need one.

Turning back to her, he asked, "how are you doing, my love?"

"I'm alright, I guess," Cardella replied, "I just have a lot to think about now."

"We all do," he muttered. "Tell you what, why don't you come 'round my weyr in a few days time and myself and some greenriders I know will start helping you get around this crazy place called Dragonsfall. How's that sound?" That way he could keep an eye on her and make sure she was going to be alright.

She nodded.

Last updated on the January 28th 2012

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Cardella and the Green Boys