Wavering Resolve

Writers: Dana, Eimi
Date Posted: 30th March 2007

Characters: Larken, M'tone, Ojisan
Description: Larken sees M'tone with yet another woman, and her resolve about what is right and what isn't wavers.
Location: Dolphin Cove Weyr
Date: month 2, day 27 of Turn 4

"I'm glad the dining cavern isn't too crowded," Larken told her husband as they sat down at one of tables tucked away in the corner. Despite her efforts to venture out of their weyr more, crowds and endless noise still took a lot out of her, and she would find herself wanting to bolt to someplace more quiet. But she wanted to keep Ojisan from worrying...so she made the effort.

"Yes, I'm sorry I was so late getting home. I tried to get back earlier, but our piece just needs so much work." And he had already taken so much time off to be with her in the evenings. She seemed to be doing so much better. At least she was coming out more, and talking. And sometimes at night, she even would let him hold her. Larken wasn't back completely, but he was sure now that the healers were right, it was just a temporary slump. He could be patient for the rest to come in time.

"I don't mind," she told him softly, picking up her roll and nibbling at it. She really wasn't too hungry, but she didn't want Ojisan to start hovering anxiously over her again. Larken knew that he was well aware of the fact that she still wasn't quite right, but as long as he didn't hand her over to a mindhealer... She would suffer in silence.

He carefully laid his napkin across his lap. "I'm afraid I'll have a practice tomorrow. I would much rather spend the restday with you. But perhaps you could get out of the weyr for a little while. You are looking a little pale. Fresh air would do you good."

That was the last thing she wanted to do, but she forced a small smile and nodded before taking another bite of her bread. "I might go down to the beach. The air is certainly fresh down there." But that place reminded her of M'tone. It would hurt her to go down there and remember.

"I think that's a fine idea," Ojisan smiled encouragingly.

Maybe she wouldn't go down there. But where else could she go? Maybe she just wouldn't go outside at all. She hid a wince behind her glass. And tell Ojisan yet _another_ lie? Shards... **How much longer are you going to do this to yourself, Larken? To _him_?** No. She _had_ to go down there and prove to herself that she could take that step to overcome this sharding low she was in. So what if it reminded her of M'tone? She was stronger than that. She had to be stronger than that. "Maybe I'll being a book too."

"Now that sounds like the perfect way to spend a rest day. I wish I could join you." Unfortunately he had several pieces his ensemble needed to practice. And Larken did seem better...

"Perhaps next time?" Though she had to admit...she was glad she'd have tomorrow all to herself. Maybe that is what she needed the most: a whole day to think things over...to force the two sides of herself to come to a sharding understanding.

"Yes, I hope so," her husband nodded. "But I really want to perfect this piece. You should hear it, Larken. The rhythms and harmony are so new and different. It really is a very unique style. I think you'd like it."

"I'd love to hear it." Larken chose that moment to look up from her dinner plate--and she felt her breath catch. Oh _shards_... Not again. And all of a sudden, all of that jealousy she'd been trying to shove away came rushing back to the surface as M'tone and a leggy blonde sat down together not five tables from where she and Ojisan were.

As her husband continued to drone on about cutting edge musical theory, Larken watched as the brownrider leaned closer to the greenrider. She giggled, casually whipping her long blonde hair over her shoulder so she could lean a little closer, his lips almost touching her ear. The smile on her face was telling as her hand slipped under the table, her arm at too obvious an angle to be mistaken for resting on her own leg.

Larken knew she shouldn't watch. She shouldn't. But she couldn't tear her eyes away from M'tone: he had the same look on his face that he'd gotten when he'd been with _her_. That same mischievous grin, those same laughing eyes...she could almost feel his lips against her ear... **Shards and shells, Larken. Stop it.**

He placed a kiss just below her ear before sitting up straight and reaching for the spoon that sat between them. Taking a scoop from the custard dessert that sat on the table between them he teasingly held it out for her, taunting her to take a bite.

"Larken?" Ojisan asked for a second time trying to get her attention.

Shaking herself, she tore her eyes away from the brownrider and looked at her husband. "I'm sorry, Ojisan." She had the grace enough to blush while silently berating herself within. "I...I was lost in thought for a moment."

"Well, could you pass me the salt, please, love?"

Ducking her head, she dutifully complied, but her thoughts were far from the dinner table--and salt. Rather, they were focused jealously on a brownrider crooning soft promises in a woman's ear.

Last updated on the March 31st 2007

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Wavering Resolve