Memories

Writers: Eimi, Paula
Date Posted: 21st June 2011

Characters: Yanley, Benaroy
Description: Yanley remisences at her father's grave.
Location: Amber Hills Hold
Date: month 2, day 7 of Turn 6
Notes: Mentioned: Royan

Yanley

After Yanley had got settled down to her new quarters, she went to
outside for walk to see what changes time had brought to her homehold.

Last time she had been here had been for her father's funeral and that
had been just a short visit. Things had just gone downhill from
Benaroy's death. Yanley knew he would have never accepted this divorce.
He would probably understood Golansin's need for heir, but it wasn't
like his blood line was in danger of dying out. He had plenty of
siblings, nephews and cousins to choose from. Yanley had once suggested
that they could adopt one of his nephews. Xolthor, for instance, was
promising lad and with proper upbringing, he would make a fine Lord Holder
some day. Keeping a mistress was one thing, shells, she would even adopted
any bastards he might have sired, but kicking out your full-blooded lady
wife and marrying your mistress was whole another matter. She tried to
kept the surge bitterness under the lid.

She found Benaroy's memorial. Kneeling in front of it, she realized she
had been heading this way whole time. She touched the stone. "Ah,
father, I miss you," she sighed. She had been a willfull,
temperamentical child, probably not the easiest one to handle. How many
times she had threatened or even tried to run off? She never got past
the hills surroundig the main hold. If it wasn't someone catching up
with her, it was her own sense of duty and love for her family that
stopped her and made her turn back home. Mostly she had done it to get
attention, especially the attention of a father who immersed himself to
work.

~*~ flashback begins ~*~

"I'm running away! " she declared, standing on her father's office door.
She had her doll wrapped in blanket with some fruits she had snatched
from the kitchen. She was wearing her brother's clothes, something her
mother would never approve. They didn't quite fit, beeing too large for
her slim frame.

The pen did not leave Benaroy's hand, but he did lift his eyes to the
child standing so defiantly in front of him. "You are, are you?" he
simply asked.

"Yes, and you can't stop me," she said, hoping he would. She lifted her
chin determinedly. She had her mother's brown eyes but her strong,
angular jaw was unmistakenly from her father.

"And where will you run to?" he asked, looking back down at his paper to
make a couple more notations.

**Look at me!** she wanted to scream and trample her feet. But that was
not how Lord Holder's daughter behaved, as her mother always nagged to
her. The queston actually gave her a pause. "I go to Weyrhold!" She
declared brightly, delighted with her own brilliancy.

"And how will you get to a Weyrhold?" he asked, sounding absolutely
unconcerned by the news.

"I take a runner," shs scowled. She wasn't stupid, she knew it was too
far to walk. She didn't have a clear image though, how far it really
was.

"All right." He set that paper aside and grabbed another one off the
pile. "Which runner would you like to take?"

"I'll take the Snowlight," the mare was her favourite and docile enough
so the stablehands let her ride her, under their watchful eyes.

Benaroy looked up at her, his face holding an expression of shock. "But
she's the Stablemaster's mare. He'll cry if you take Snowlight. The
Stablemaster has always been kind to you! You don't want to make him
sad, do you? No, no that will not do. You will have to take another
one."

Yanley pouted. "Well, Renegade then," that was her father's mount, and
frankly so temperamentical that she wasn't allowed close. Some stable
boys couldn't handle him.

"But Renegade loves me," Benaroy said with a sad shake of his head. "He
would miss me too much and he would feel so very lonely. I'm sorry, but
you don't want to make Renegade sad, do you?"

"No, I don't," Yanley sighed. "I want runner of my own."

He pushed his chair back and moved around the desk and knelt down in
front of her. "But, if I gave you a runner, Yanley, then you'd leave
me, and then _I'd_ be sad. You don't want to make _me_ sad, do you?"

"No, I wouldn't want to make you sad, father," she replied. She was
cornered and knew it. "If I promise I won't run away, can I then have a
pony?" she looked him with bright eyes.

"No, my little love, I will not give you a pony," he said gently,
knowing that if he gave her what she wanted now, she would only try this
tactic again in the future. "I don't want you to stay for a pony. I
want you to stay because you love me, and you know this Hold has a lot
of trouble, and because you know that I have a lot of worries and lot of
pressure on me every day, and you don't want to make me have to worry
about you and miss you everyday. So you have to choose. Do you want to
leave with the finest runner in my Hold? Or do you want to stay with me
with no pony, but you have me?"

She pondered it seriously. She had his attention now, which was all she
really wanted. "I'll stay," she said, and hugged him. "I'll even give
Royan his clothes back."

"Thank you," he said, taking the luxury of just holding his daughter for
a moment. Benaroy knew that was what she had really be craving, just a
little bit of his time. But if it wasn't for her, her brothers and
sisters, and the extended family of the Hold, he would have run away
from that pit of a Hold himself a long time ago.

Last updated on the June 24th 2011

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