Fly Safe (1/2)

Writers: Eimi
Date Posted: 11th February 2011

Characters: U'kaiah, B'ram
Description: B'ram tells U'kaiah the truth behind the rumors
Location: Dolphin Cove Weyr
Date: month 13, day 8 of Turn 5
Notes: Mentions: Traelyn

Notes: Part 1 of 2

B'ram

The news took very little time to reach Draongsfall. It was a dramatic
shake-up that would effect the whole region, after all. Moreover, it
was a great story for idle tongues.

Traelyn had flown into Dolphin Cove on a recklace whim, and in an odd
twist of fate had managed to find herself in the position of Senior
Queen. It had been quite the inadvertent coup. Had it been planned, it
couldn't have played out better. No one thought the goldrider's sudden
ascent could be topped in terms of the magnitude of the scandal.

And yet, it seemed, Traelyn was determined to try, for as suddenly as
she gained power, just as quickly she apparently lost it. And 'lost it'
was a very ironic description, for it seemed the Weyrwoman had suddenly
and inexplicably cracked her shell. Rumors were flying about like
Thread in a windstorm, many wholly without base. But one was whispered
more loudly than the rest - Traelyn had tried to take her gold,
Nyith,/between/.

It was unthinkable. It was inexcusable. It was incomprehensible. A
breeding queen in the time of a Pass being killed _purposely_ by her own
rider, thereby robbing the planet of hundreds of dragons that would be
needed to mount a defense against Thread. It was the kind of accusation
that sent a chill up the spine of every dragonrider, every citizen of
Pern.

Even Cyan's Wingleader, U'kaiah, turned pale when he heard the news.
But the image in his mind was not of a reckless and half-crazed
goldrider. As the blood drained from his face, it was a very different
picture he held in his mind's eye - looking up into deep grey eyes with
a spark of playfulness and smoldering heat, kiss-swollen pink lips
smiling as white-gold hair cascaded down around him. **Trae...**

He called his bronze to him, forgetting the long silence that had been
between them the last Turn. If ever she needed him, it was now. It
seemed to take an eternity before they burst into Dolphin Cove's skies.
As his bronze trumpeted his peaceful intentions to the dragon on the
watch, U'kaiah marveled at how little had changed since the last time
they were there.

**Take us down,** he silently commanded.

}:U'kaiah,:{ Kalamath replied gently, }: They are not here.:{

**Take us down,** his rider repeated, not wanting to believe it.

}:They are far away from here,:{ the bronze said adamantly, even as he
swung round on a wingtip to obey his lifemate's command.

U'kaiah had to see for himself. In his heart, he knew his bronze would
not lie to him, but he had to be sure. As Kalamath backwinged gently
onto the familiar ledge, the straps were already undone and he slid
straight off his lifemate's neck. "Trae?"

He called, pulling the curtain aside. Rustling from the sleeping
chamber. "Trae?" he called again, stopping with both hands on the
doorjam.

"She's not here, bronzerider." A man with spiky red hair stepped out
from her closet, a pile of tunics in hand.

"Where is she?" U'kaiah asked. He wanted answers and he was in no mood
to wait for them.

B'ram bristled at the tone in his voice. How dare he come flying in
demanding answers! If he cared so sharding much, where had he been the
last turn? And yet, the brownrider knew he was partially to blame for
the end of their relationship. Faranth knew he had poured enough poison
into Trae's ear over the brief months she and the bronzerider had been
together. But what
else could he do? He could not lose her to this man.

**Trae would want him to know. After everything, B'ram, you owe her
that much.**

"It's as I'm sure you've heard," he said, his tone even as he threw the
pile of tunics onto the bed and began to fold them. "They've taken her
and Nyith to a Mindhealer's Hall where they'll be safe."

"What happened?" U'kaiah's tone was pleading as he took a step further
into
the chamber. This man's relationship with Trae, any jealousy or
bitterness he might have felt for him, even his own pride was nothing
now. The brownrider had answers that U'kaiah desperately needed if he
was ever to find her.

"I don't _know_ what happened!" B'ram snapped back, though it was more
out of frustration for lacking a better answer than annoyance at the
question. Sitting down on the edge of the bed, one of Trae's tunics
still clutched in his hand, his tone changed to one of helplessness. "I
should have seen it, but it was just so gradual. I didn't even
realize..."

U'kaiah knew the man was willing, maybe even needing to talk. "Go on."

The words started flowing out of B'ram with the bronzerider's
encouragement. "I guess it started when I found out about the boy.
About five
months ago I got word from Far Island that I might have fathered a son.
At first Trae seemed supportive, even promising to go with me to meet
him. But then suddenly she changed her mind. She just couldn't go back
there. Too
many painful memories."

B'ram hadn't taken her reneging on her promise well. He remembered they
had quite the argument when she told him. He had accused her of being
fickle, of thinking only of her own needs and desires. When he came
back they had made up in their usual way - tearing the clothes off each
other angrily and then looking all contrite afterwards. Neither one
said they were sorry out loud but they knew. It had always been their
way.

"Anyway," he said, shaking off the memory, "she asked me about him a few
times. She wanted to know what he looked like, if I thought he was
really my son, what I wanted to do, how I felt about it all. It was
hard to say. It was very possible he was mine, but even if he is, he
already has a father to take care of him. So I didn't know how to
answer a lot of her questions, and looking back, I think she was
looking for reassurance, but I just didn't know what would happen.

"A month or so later I went back again to see the boy, but also to talk
to his mother and just try to figure out where to go from there. Well,
when I came back after visiting her again, Trae was different. Distant.
She asked if I was going to leave her to go be with my son. I told her
that
I had no plans to leave her. But she seemed sure it was only a matter
of time. She was convinced I would move to Far Island, and she would be
alone. I told her to stop talking crazy, that I wasn't going anywhere,
but she wouldn't listen to me. Nothing I said appeased her. She kept
bringing it up for days, always saying 'When you leave me' like it was
already decided, and I got more and more frustrated with trying to
convince her that I was telling truth! I would never have left her, but
she refused to believe me."

He had tried to show her in more than words. B'ram knew Trae didn't
believe in pretty words. The Far Island bronzeriders had made sure to
teach her that all the sweetest words on Pern didn't mean a thing when
all a man wanted was to get into her bed and have his dragon fly hers.
She couldn't trust words, but usually she could trust a touch, the
feeling of another person holding her, loving her. But even that didn't
seem to get through to her. Trae was sure he would leave her and she
would be utterly alone.

"Well, one night I had enough. When she brought it up, I told her I
never wanted to hear about it anymore,
and that if she ever brought it up again I really _would_ move to Far
Island. I said it in the moment. I didn't mean it." Looking back, it
was the cruelest thing
B'ram could have said, which is probably why he chose those words. But
they had always done that, found the chinks in the other's armor and
used it against them when they were angry. It had always been the
ugliest part of their relationship.

"She finally stopped bringing up," at least until the next time he went
to Far Island, "but then started talking about other things. Things
that no one should _want_ to talk about. She started asking me what I
thought it would be like /between/. 'What happens to a person when they
go /between/?' she asked. 'Do they just fade away? Do they die
quickly? Or slowly? Or do they live forever?' I told her it was
nonsense, that no one could know and no one should ever find out. One
night just out of nowhere she said that the only bad thing about
/between/ is the cold emptiness, but as long as she could hear Nyith,
she could get used to it." Even now the thought sent a chill down his
spine. "Again, I got angry and threated her with leaving, just wanting
to get her to stop."

"She did stop talking about dying, and stopped accusing me of wanting to
leave her which was a relief. But then she started disappearing. She
would leave the Weyr for candlemarks at a time, and not tell anyone
where she was going. When she came back, I'd ask her where she was, and
she wouldn't tell me. She'd just say 'No where.' I'd ask who she was
with and she said 'no one'. Well, I didn't believe her. I was sure she
was running off to meet someone. I was sure she was going to meet
_you_."

B'ram knew that the end of her relationship with the bronzerider had
been hard for Trae,
that even after it was over, she had a hard time letting go of him.
Trae would
stop sometimes in the middle of doing something, looking as if she were
staring into the back of /between/, and sometimes a soft smile would
touch her lips or a gentle light was in her eye. When he'd ask her what
was thinking, she'd look almost ashamed, like he had caught her doing
something she shouldn't. B'ram knew it was her Dragonsfall bronzerider
that she saw in her mind's eye. He had seen the way she smiled and
looked at him first hand. Despite knowing it was over between them,
knowing that tender warmth was meant for another man tore at his heart.
His greatest fear was that one day the bronzerider would come back into
her life.

But none of that mattered now.

Last updated on the January 9th 2012

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Fly Safe (1/2)