My Secret

Writers: Heather, Miriah
Date Posted: 11th January 2020

Characters: D'hol, Saidrene
Description: Saidrene reveals a secret to D'hol
Location: Barrier Lake Weyr
Date: month 1, day 21 of Turn 10
Notes: Mentioned; K'ran, J'nus, Timassa

D'hol

Saidrene

Saidrene had kept it as quiet as she could, for as long as she could,
until the healer threatened to go to her Wingleader himself. It wasn't
that she was trying to keep the news from D'hol in particular but she
had needed a few days to think and decide what she should do.

"Wingleader?" Saidrene inquired at D'hol's open door, knocking lightly on it.

"Come in." He looked up from his desk and straightened when he saw
Saidrene. One brow quirked upwards. She didn't often see the need to
come to him for anything. "What can I help you with?"

"I just needed to come inform you, before the healers did," she said a
she took a seat in front of him, "that I'm pregnant." She hated to
even tell him because it made her feel like she was letting the
leadership around Barrier Lake down. She had come there to work in the
dragon infirmary and put in long days, and now here she was pregnant.

D'hol sighed, putting down the hides. He honestly needed all the
greenriders to be active in the wings. They were stretched thin
already, and the loss of even one added a strain. "I see. And
what's your plan?"

She couldn't help but take his sigh personally, because it was exactly
what she had expected. "I will be keeping it. I apologize, sir, I know
it's not the best time."

"No, it's really not." He agreed readily, then rubbed his chin. "But
some things can't be helped and it's completely your choice to keep
your child." He drummed his fingers against his desk. "It will
however, allow you more time in the dragon infirmary. You're
relieved of your wing duties for now, but I'd like you to go full
time in the dragon infirmary until and unless the Healers tell you
otherwise. We are short staffed there and K'lvin needs the assistance.
You need to be prepared to return immediately to the wings as soon as
the child is born and you've healed enough after."

"Absolutely, sir. I will report to K'lvin tomorrow for full time duty
in the infirmary." It would be a good opportunity to work on her
craft, even if it was not originally why she had come to Barrier Lake.
"As soon as the healers clear me after delivery I will report back to
the Wing."

He nodded. "Good. How far along are you, Saidrene?" He pulled her
file. "Not too far I assume, you've been fighting Thread since you got
here."

"Twelve sevendays, as of yesterday." Yesterday had really solidified
for her that she was going to keep the baby. The first time she had
ever been pregnant she had shared the secret with her mother, who had
convinced her to abort it, this time, she had told no one. Hearing the
heartbeat, however, had made it impossible for her to think of doing
anything other than having the baby.

D'hol stilled and looked up at her, frowning as he laid down the hide.
"You're very lucky that you still have the baby. You should have told
me the first instant that you suspected, Saidrene, especially if you
planned on keeping it. You should have never been /betweening/ far
along." He rubbed a temple. "Consider yourself thoroughly scolded for
taking that much risk." He leaned back. "Does K'ran know at least?"

Saidrene opened her mouth to explain that she hadn't known herself for
at least six sevendays that she was pregnant. With an irregular cycle
and being so busy around the Weyrhold, she had not thought a thing
about the possibility of being pregnant. And then for the last six
sevendays, well, indecision had paralyzed her. Not knowing what she
was going to do about the father of the baby. She closed her mouth,
knowing that D'hol wouldn't be interested in her excuses, because she
knew it had been irresponsible.

"K'ran, sir?" she asked.

D'hol arched a brow. "Are you and he not..." he waived a hand, "...I
assumed that you and he were involved. You did spend quite a bit of
time together and it's not unheard of for a bronzerider to prefer a
greenrider as a mate." His lips curled slightly. "If I'm wrong, then I
apologize. It's honestly none of my business."

"I'm not really... The father of the baby is...." Saidrene ran a hand
over her face, the corners of her mouth quirking upwards in a weak
smile. "I'll inform the father when I am ready, sir. Thank you for the
concern."

"Of course. But if I may offer some advice from the male perspective?"
He leaned forward. "Don't wait to long to tell whoever it is, alright?
Some men want to be involved with their children." He then shrugged.
"At least give the option if you can. Again, your choice. But, if you
need help you can still come to me, J'nus, or Timassa if you need
anything. I'll let K'lvin know that he can expect a full time
assistant until the Healers say otherwise."

"Thank you, sir, and thank you for the advice." It sounded like such
an easy thing to do, just 'tell the father,' but for Saidrene, it just
wasn't that easy. What if the baby's father blamed her for the
pregnancy? What if he wanted nothing to do with it? What if he
regretted her decision to keep the baby? She could not face him, at
the moment, not when she wasn't sure what his reaction would be. For
now, or until she felt more confident, the baby's father would be her
secret.

Last updated on the February 1st 2020

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My Secret