Wallowing in Misery

Writers: Eimi, Paula
Date Posted: 25th July 2017

Characters: Kaiafel, Aileyan, J'nev
Description: Kaiafel delivers an unwanted letter to Aileyan, and J'nev actually makes a bit of sense...
Location: Dragonsfall Weyr
Date: month 13, day 6 of Turn 8
Notes: Kaiafel tapped on the door, holding a small folded hide in his hand. Truth be told, he wished his mother hadn't sent him on this errand. It made him feel a little uncomfortable, like he was caught in the middle between two people he cared about deeply, even though he couldn't quite figure out why.

Aileyan opened the door. "Hi, Kaiafel," she greeted with a smile.

"Hi, Aileyan. How is Kjarliheth today?" If his formal greeting hadn't given away his unease, his shifting from foot to foot might have.

"She's fine, and no, she doesn't need a wash today, I'm sorry," Aileyan smiled.

"Oh, uh no... see..." He grimaced slightly and took a deep breath. "My Da wrote letters to all of us today - me, Tavia, you and Ravyan, and... well..." Kaiafel thrust out the hide he was carrying. "This is yours and Ravyan's letter."

"Oh," Aileyan's face fell. It wasn't Kaiafel's fault though. "Thank you," she took the letter.

It was the reaction he had expected. He didn't know why his Da's letters made her so sad. Something felt very off. "Anyway, that's for you. I should... go..."

"Yeah, see you around," Aileyan replied absently, staring the hide. She didn't know why she kept reading them. She really just should burn it without reading.

Kaiafel could tell she was lost in her own thoughts, so he mumbled a goodbye and retreated back to his mother's weyr, wondering why things just felt so wrong.

When Kaiafel had left, Aileyan sat down and read the letter. She didn't know why she kept reading them, because they hurt. Except Ravyan had right to know how he was doing. It was his usual stuff, how much he missed and loved them (yeah, right, if he loved them so much, why had he left then?), news, asking about Ravyan's classes and the things the boys have done together. He also begged her to reply, well he could keep begging. She crumpled the hide and tossed it away. Unshed tears burned behind her lids. She was not going to cry, not this time, not again. She pulled her knees against her chest, wrapped her arms around them and rocked herself. No crying, she keep telling to herself.

On the ledge, Kjarliheth sighed, her rider was doing it again. The green wondered if she should reach to someone, but who? She couldn't even remember who was the cause of all this.

}:Kjarliheth's wants to know if you did something to make hers sad.:{ Ankioth informed his rider.

"What?!" For Faranth's sake, what did he do now? He hadn't even seen Aileyan for days! Or was that what she was so upset about? Or maybe she had heard that he had slept with Suala the other night. Well, why in shells not! It wasn't like they were exclusive or anything. Then again, it was Aileyen. Who knew what went on in that girls brain. **Tell her... Never mind. You know what? I'll just go down there and find out myself.**

Aileyan didn't react to the knock on the floor, still rocking herself and wallowing in misery.

**Sharding woman. Now she wants to just ignore me? Well, to the Red Star with that game!** He thought as he opened the door. "Aileyan?"

"What?" She nearly jumped out of her skin.

"What do you want, Aileyan," J'nev asked, sure that she was sulking because of something he had done. Again.

"Where did you come from? This has nothing to do with you. Did Kjarliheth call to Ankioth?" Aileyan asked with confusion and growing suspicion towards certain meddling green. **Kjarrie? Did you stick your muzzle into this?**

}: Who? Me?::{ Aileyan wasn't fooled by her innocent tone at all.

"Ankioth told me I did something to make you sad," he replied, now more confused than ever. Just _what_ had nothing to do with him? This girl was so sharding confusing! If he didn't have so much fun when they stopped talking, it really wouldn't be worth all this trouble. Problem was she was worth the trouble.

"My scatterbrained green probably got the bronzes mixed up. Kalamath, not Ankioth."

"Ok, so you're not upset at me?" Suddenly the name clicked. "Wait, Kalamath? U'kaiah bronze?"

"That's the one, her past mate, which she doesn't remember any longer," Aileyan replied.

**Fickle creatures...** But... That meant Aileyan was upset because of _U'kaiah_. He was the one who made her sad. That meant J'nev could be the one to make her feel better. And wouldn't that wherry's ass just love that! "If only you could forget as easily, eh?" he sighed, slipping onto the sofa next to her.

"Yes, sometimes I envy them," Aileyan replied. "I would be so much happier if I could just forget somethings."

"Make out with me." He raised his hand to stop any knee-jerk protest she might have in mind. "I mean, let me help you forget."

"You really jump right to the heart of the matter," Aileyan said with irritated voice. "Is that all you ever think of? Sex?"

"Look, I didn't come here for sex. I came here because your dragon knew you were sad. And why are you sad? Because U'kaiah's a sharding wherry's ass that didn't know a good thing when he had it. That's not my fault, and that's not your fault. Why should you be the one who's sad?" He turned his body to look at her directly. "Yeah, I could have tried to be all smooth and convince you, but let's face it, you'd see right through that and think I was just taking this opportunity to get some. That wouldn't make you feel better. You won't feel better until you stop thinking about him. How can you stop thinking about him? By thinking about something else. Make out with me, and remember you don't need him any more. Don't think about him. Think about me."

Aileyan looked thoughtful and was quiet and think for a moment. "You do talk sense, sort of," she said eventually.

"I'll leave it up to you. If you want to give it a try, you make the first move. Take it as far as you need it to go. And if it works, you'll know how to feel better next time, and you won't need me to 'jump to the heart' of anything." He knew there was an equal chance that she would kick him out of her weyr right then and there. She was as predictable as Thread in a hurricane. But, he put the offer out there. She'd either have to take it or leave it.

"I'll think about it," Aileyan said. Right now she just wanted to mope.

"Should I go?" he asked, pointing a thumb at the door.

"It's a better if you go. I want to be alone," Aileyan said quietly.

He shrugged, giving up. For now at least. Any time he left Aileyan without more confusion that when he came was a win in his mind. "Well, just pass me a message when you want to find me." Still, as he walked to the door, he felt a sense of curious excitement at the thought that next time she just might take him up on that offer...

Kaiafel tapped on the door, holding a small folded hide in his hand. Truth be told, he wished his mother hadn't sent him on this errand. It made him feel a little uncomfortable, like he was caught in the middle between two people he cared about deeply, even though he couldn't quite figure out why.

Aileyan opened the door. "Hi, Kaiafel," she greeted with a smile.

"Hi, Aileyan. How is Kjarliheth today?" If his formal greeting hadn't given away his unease, his shifting from foot to foot might have.

"She's fine, and no, she doesn't need a wash today, I'm sorry," Aileyan smiled.

"Oh, uh no... see..." He grimaced slightly and took a deep breath. "My Da wrote letters to all of us today - me, Tavia, you and Ravyan, and... well..." Kaiafel thrust out the hide he was carrying. "This is yours and Ravyan's letter."

"Oh," Aileyan's face fell. It wasn't Kaiafel's fault though. "Thank you," she took the letter.

It was the reaction he had expected. He didn't know why his Da's letters made her so sad. Something felt very off. "Anyway, that's for you. I should... go..."

"Yeah, see you around," Aileyan replied absently, staring the hide. She didn't know why she kept reading them. She really just should burn it without reading.

Kaiafel could tell she was lost in her own thoughts, so he mumbled a goodbye and retreated back to his mother's weyr, wondering why things just felt so wrong.

When Kaiafel had left, Aileyan sat down and read the letter. She didn't know why she kept reading them, because they hurt. Except Ravyan had right to know how he was doing. It was his usual stuff, how much he missed and loved them (yeah, right, if he loved them so much, why had he left then?), news, asking about Ravyan's classes and the things the boys have done together. He also begged her to reply, well he could keep begging. She crumpled the hide and tossed it away. Unshed tears burned behind her lids. She was not going to cry, not this time, not again. She pulled her knees against her chest, wrapped her arms around them and rocked herself. No crying, she keep telling to herself.

On the ledge, Kjarliheth sighed, her rider was doing it again. The green wondered if she should reach to someone, but who? She couldn't even remember who was the cause of all this.

}:Kjarliheth's wants to know if you did something to make hers sad.:{ Ankioth informed his rider.

"What?!" For Faranth's sake, what did he do now? He hadn't even seen Aileyan for days! Or was that what she was so upset about? Or maybe she had heard that he had slept with Suala the other night. Well, why in shells not! It wasn't like they were exclusive or anything. Then again, it was Aileyen. Who knew what went on in that girls brain. **Tell her... Never mind. You know what? I'll just go down there and find out myself.**

Aileyan didn't react to the knock on the floor, still rocking herself and wallowing in misery.

**Sharding woman. Now she wants to just ignore me? Well, to the Red Star with that game!** He thought as he opened the door. "Aileyan?"

"What?" She nearly jumped out of her skin.

"What do you want, Aileyan," J'nev asked, sure that she was sulking because of something he had done. Again.

"Where did you come from? This has nothing to do with you. Did Kjarliheth call to Ankioth?" Aileyan asked with confusion and growing suspicion towards certain meddling green. **Kjarrie? Did you stick your muzzle into this?**

}: Who? Me?::{ Aileyan wasn't fooled by her innocent tone at all.

"Ankioth told me I did something to make you sad," he replied, now more confused than ever. Just _what_ had nothing to do with him? This girl was so sharding confusing! If he didn't have so much fun when they stopped talking, it really wouldn't be worth all this trouble. Problem was she was worth the trouble.

"My scatterbrained green probably got the bronzes mixed up. Kalamath, not Ankioth."

"Ok, so you're not upset at me?" Suddenly the name clicked. "Wait, Kalamath? U'kaiah bronze?"

"That's the one, her past mate, which she doesn't remember any longer," Aileyan replied.

**Fickle creatures...** But... That meant Aileyan was upset because of _U'kaiah_. He was the one who made her sad. That meant J'nev could be the one to make her feel better. And wouldn't that wherry's ass just love that! "If only you could forget as easily, eh?" he sighed, slipping onto the sofa next to her.

"Yes, sometimes I envy them," Aileyan replied. "I would be so much happier if I could just forget somethings."

"Make out with me." He raised his hand to stop any knee-jerk protest she might have in mind. "I mean, let me help you forget."

"You really jump right to the heart of the matter," Aileyan said with irritated voice. "Is that all you ever think of? Sex?"

"Look, I didn't come here for sex. I came here because your dragon knew you were sad. And why are you sad? Because U'kaiah's a sharding wherry's ass that didn't know a good thing when he had it. That's not my fault, and that's not your fault. Why should you be the one who's sad?" He turned his body to look at her directly. "Yeah, I could have tried to be all smooth and convince you, but let's face it, you'd see right through that and think I was just taking this opportunity to get some. That wouldn't make you feel better. You won't feel better until you stop thinking about him. How can you stop thinking about him? By thinking about something else. Make out with me, and remember you don't need him any more. Don't think about him. Think about me."

Aileyan looked thoughtful and was quiet and think for a moment. "You do talk sense, sort of," she said eventually.

"I'll leave it up to you. If you want to give it a try, you make the first move. Take it as far as you need it to go. And if it works, you'll know how to feel better next time, and you won't need me to 'jump to the heart' of anything." He knew there was an equal chance that she would kick him out of her weyr right then and there. She was as predictable as Thread in a hurricane. But, he put the offer out there. She'd either have to take it or leave it.

"I'll think about it," Aileyan said. Right now she just wanted to mope.

"Should I go?" he asked, pointing a thumb at the door.

"It's a better if you go. I want to be alone," Aileyan said quietly.

He shrugged, giving up. For now at least. Any time he left Aileyan without more confusion that when he came was a win in his mind. "Well, just pass me a message when you want to find me." Still, as he walked to the door, he felt a sense of curious excitement at the thought that next time she just might take him up on that offer...

Last updated on the August 24th 2017

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Wallowing in Misery