Say What You Mean

Writers: Eimi, Yvonne
Date Posted: 1st April 2006

Characters: K'far, Harki
Description: Rumors are powerful, but can you believe what you hear?
Location: Dragonsfall Weyr
Date: month 10, day 15 of Turn 3
Notes: Follows 'To Distraction'

She'd been avoiding him, and telling Cerillith to relay the message
that she was 'busy' whenever K'far asked Torth to help find her. But
even she had to eat, and with U'kaiah off doing whatever he usually
did to avoid her, and Sarian being- well, Sarian, and nobody else she
knew to use as protection, she found herself wolfing down her mid-day
meal while trying not to look _too_ paranoid.

"Ah, there you are," K'far said as he slid onto the seat next to her.

"I knew I'd pin you down one of these days."

"Yeah..." Harki glanced up: the dining cavern was crowded. Her heart
sped up anyway, but she wasn't sure if it was because of what she
knew, or what she knew he could do to her. In _or_ out of bed.

"You know, if I didn't know better, which lucky for you I'm pretty
dense," the brownrider said with a small smile, "I'd say you've been
avoiding me on purpose."

The greenrider sighed and looked down at her plate. She wasn't hungry
anymore. "You know that drudge? The one that kept following you
around for months?"

"Yes, I think so," he snorted sarcastically. "And if I forgot all I
have to do is listen to the rumors and they will remind me soon
enough."

Harki put down her fork and turned to face K'far. "They're saying you
killed her."

"Yes, that's what I hear," K'far frowned. "But I thought you might
have known be better than that."

"Well- you _said_ you'd do it." She wouldn't meet his eyes. "And I...
don't know."

"Have I ever given you a reason not to believe me?"

"She was weird. You hated her. And you-" Harki looked around, then
lowered her voice. "You _said_ that you'd kill her! K'far - you
scared me."

"I didn't _mean_ I would really kill her, Harki," he whispered back.
"It was an _expression_ for Faranth's sake!"

"Well, you _looked_ scorching serious. And now she's gone missing and
people are asking questions. You even got called in to see the
_Weyrwoman_!"

"And I told her all I know, which is _nothing_. I didn't hurt
Nineba. I wouldn't hurt _anyone_. I'm a _dragonrider_ for shards
sake."

"Yeah, but did you _kill_ her?" She could have been smothered by a
pillow. Or poisoned. Technically, that wouldn't hurt.

K'far shook his head emphatically. "No, Harki. I didn't kill her.
I didn't hurt her. And I don't know where she is or where she went
or what happened to her. Now you know as much as the Weyrwoman or I
know."

And she still didn't know what to believe. "She stalked you
everywhere, and now you have _no_idea_ where she is."

"No, one day she was my shadow and the next day she was gone. And as
much as I hope nothing terrible happened to her, I am relieved that
she isn't always hanging over my shoulder. That doesn't make me a
_murderer_!"

"Well- who _else_ would have wanted to get rid of her!?" Harki
hissed.

"Who says _anyone_ got rid of her?" he shot back. "There hasn't been
any body found. We don't know that she really _is_ dead. She might
have gone back to Dolphin Cove." Though he knew the chances of that
happening were growing slim.

"Nobody's found her there, either, otherwise nobody'd think she was
dead! And she has to be dead - nobody disappears for this long.
There's no other explanation." Nineba _had_ to be dead - gruesomely
dead - if she'd left K'far alone. **Maybe he chopped off her head,**
Harki thought wildly, **Or her arms. Shards, maybe he's got her
locked up somewhere to starve!**

}:Stop thinking bad thoughts,:{ Cerillith told her chidingly.
}:Torth's rider isn't a bad man, and you shouldn't treat him like
one. Torth says so.:{

**Like Torth would be a good judge of his own rider's character,**
Harki shot back, and she could feel her dragon's exasperation. It
didn't change her mind, or stop her from wondering just _what_ the
dark line was beneath K'far's thumbnail.

"Well, it seems your mind is just all made up then, isn't it," K'far
sighed. Sharding Nineba. That woman has a long reach.

She suddenly felt guilty for thinking K'far was guilty - but guilty
as well for feeling guilty about accusing a murderer. Possible
murderer. She shook her head - as if _that_ would be able to sort out
the tangle in her head! "I don't know. I don't know about you, I
don't know about me, I don't know about anything except Thread and my
dragon, all right?"

He shrugged slightly. "Well, I know you and I had a lot of fun
together, and I never tried to hurt you, did I? Did I ever give you
a reason to think that I would do such a terrible thing?"

No. Maybe. The night he'd carried Nineba from his weyr and dumped her
in the hall, he'd frightened her. At the time it had been exciting.
He'd seemed dangerous... a prophetic move? "No." She abruptly stood.
The dining cavern was too close; claustrophobic. She needed to feel
the wind on her face and her blood singing in her veins, and to
forget
K'far and the Weyr and stupid Nineba... maybe she'd go cliff diving
again. Or skydiving with Cerillith. "I have to go."

He grabbed her arm before she could leave. "I didn't do this, Harki.
I didn't, I swear."

"I know." It was a lie, and it stuck in her throat. She didn't know
anything anymore. Harki wrenched her arm free. "I have to go. And-
I'm sorry, K'far."

He watched her go, and could feel the eyes and hear the whispers of
those around them who had witnessed the exchange. This just wasn't
going to go away. Nineba could find him, even from wherever she was,
and make his life miserable. Again. **Sharding woman...**

Last updated on the April 9th 2006

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Say What You Mean