It's Like This, Sir.

Writers: Leigh M-F., Paula
Date Posted: 13th January 2014

Characters: E'naer, A'kua
Description: Coming clean about certain issues.
Location: Dragonsfall Weyr
Date: month 3, day 17 of Turn 7

Aluka was having a serious case of deja vu. When he'd arrived in Dragonsfall Weyr, still riding high on the exhilaration of freedom, he had been struck dumb by the sheer size and majesty of the place. That had been replaced by feeling very overwhelmed and rather small, which had been ridiculous, seeing as he was nearly six feet tall. It lead to him doubting if he had made the right choice. The redhead felt that same way now, standing in front of the door leading to E'naer's office. He wasn't ready for this. He just wasn't.

And then he remembered what he had done on his first day in the Weyr. He had snarled, slapped himself sharply on the cheek, and mentally declared that Shastia's only child was no coward. Never had been, and he wouldn't start being one. So he had better man up and get it over with.

Aluka knocked.

"Please, come in!" E'naer called. Feral warbled her own invitation from her perch on his chair back.

The redhead took a slow, deep breath, let it out, and entered the room, shutting the door firmly behind him. "Good afternoon, sir," he said in a proper Dragonsfall accent. This was a serious matter; he couldn't sound like a hick for it. "I'm sorry to intrude, but I need to speak with you. It's about.... about me. Something I need to get off my chest."

"That's why I'm here, Aluka," E'naer said with friendly and encouraging smile. "To listen to your worries and help you. Please, take a seat."

The Candidate sat as directed. Then he got up and paced for a moment, sat again and crossed his arms and legs before moving one arm long enough to tug on a lock his hair. The nervous gestures embarrassed him, but he couldn't seem to stop. He tried to organize his thoughts, looking at the ceiling as if to find inspiration there, but of course he only saw several cracks in the stone. "I'm having trouble opening up to others," he finally said in resigned tone. "I kind of want to, but I don't trust a single person in this entire Weyr, if not the entire world. I can't even get along with the other Candidates; those I think I can trust either Impress or move on, and the others, I don't have anything in common with. I don't know what to do. This is no way to make a living, but there's a stubborn little voice in my head insisting I still have to watch my back, even though no one's done me wrong here."

**One of those,** E'naer noted mentally. On her perch, Feral made a symphatic chirp. "You might have more common with them than you realize, but I you don't open up, you don't find it out... I can see your dilemma," the greenrider said. "Feral here agrees with you..." he grinned, "They can't be trusted, they're just after your eggs." A little joke to ease the situation.

Aluka didn't laugh. He did not even smirk. Not that the joke wasn't cute, but he wasn't in the mood for it. "What can I do?" was all he asked.

"You just have to build up your trust in people. Take it slow, one step at time. Find one person you like and form a friendship with him or her. We all come from different back grounds and sometimes we carry our past like a burden with us. Learning to let go off it isn't easy. And it's something only you can do. I can't change the way you are, only you can. All change comes from within," E'naer councelled as best as he could. He did have his own burden from the past after all.

"Okay, but _how_?" Aluka pressed. "I didn't have friends or anyone I could trust in Bex Hold, Weyrlingmaster; I had classmates, people I could tolerate long enough to work with, and outright enemies I loved fighting. Even my own ma-" He paused, throat briefly closing. "Well, she wasn't much of a role model of how to act in social situations. Neither was my grandsire. I don't know how to do any of this."

"Just, start talking with people. Pick a subject that's easy, like weather. People always like to complain weather...it's either too hot, too cold, too wet or too dry. Rest will follow naturally. It's called small talk and it's important part of socializing. After you get used to talking to people of non important matters, you can slowly approach more sensitive subjects," E'naer adviced. Shards, socializing came so naturally to him he didn't even think of it. How could you teach something like it to other people?

Aargh, small talk. So awkward and meaningless. But if that was what he had to do, then he had better bite the crossbow quarrel and do it. If nothing else, it would be something new to do. The redhead sighed. "I understand, Weyrlingmaster."

"I hope so," E'naer sighed. "It's something you have to do yourself."

"Don' I fardlin' know it," Aluka muttered, and rubbed his forehead. "Well, at least it's a place to start," he said in a louder tone and back in a Dragonsfall accent. "Thank you, Weyrlingmaster."

"Weyrlingmaster's Third or just Third," E'naer corrected with a grin. "I hope I helped. Anytime you need to talk, my door is open."

The tall redhead got out of the chair, sensing the advice was at an end. Starting small was the best step he could take at the moment. "Thank you, Third," he said, and paused. "I just might take you up on that offer." To be polite, he also nodded to Feral. She really was rather pretty.

"Anytime, Aluka, anytime," E'naer replied.

Last updated on the February 1st 2014

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It's Like This, Sir.