All You Can Hope For

Writers: Ames, Miriah
Date Posted: 21st July 2013

Characters: Wirnan, Karhal
Description: Karhal gives Wirnan some marriage advice
Location: Amber Hills Hold
Date: month 1, day 2 of Turn 7

Wirnan

Karhal

Karhal hadn't been able to miss the look of strain that had lately
been on the steward's face. Normally not one to pry into other's
affairs, he was none the less concerned; Wirnan, while not a
particularly close friend, had still shown concern for his own
well-being. It would not be amiss to do the same. Knocking on Wirnan's
door, he waited, drumming his fingers against his forearm.

Wirnan answered and nodded his head to the guard. "Ah, Karhal. Come
in, what can I help you with today?" He, of course, assumed Karhal was
there on matters of hold business.

Karhal entered and closed the door behind him. "I'm rather hoping I
might help you, Wirnan." He sat down across from the steward and
peered at the man for a long moment. "It's none of my business, but
Faranth, man...you look as bad as I was not a month ago, if not worse.
" Blunt, but to the point. "I'm concerned."

Wirnan stopped and simply stared at the man. He opened his mouth and
closed it again. Then with a sigh, he stated, "what's the use of
pretending, eh? I've tried for some time to make as though all was
well, but alas, Karhal, I think I can't hide it any longer."

The Guard Captain nodded and leaned his elbows on his knees. "What's
going on, Wirnan? You can tell me that it's none of my damned
business, of course, but you look like you need to talk."

He sighed, then rubbed his hands over his eyes in frustration and
exasperation. "It's my wife, my marriage. It's a shambles. All of it.
And I honestly don't know where to go from here."

And that could be a touchy subject. Karhal took a deep breath and his
voice was soft. "Can you say exactly what's going on?" He leaned
forward, his posture opening to one of understanding. "I might be able
to help a bit. My marriage to Orhla was...hard in the beginning."

Wirnan shoved a hand through his hair. "Hard is an understatement. The
whole marriage was built around a lie and nothing I do has been able
to change things. I'm tired of trying Karhal. I've been nice to her,
we've argued, everything. Still, it's like she's there, but there's
nothing more behind it. I don't want to live the rest of my life like
this."

Nodding in understanding, Karhal sat back in his chair. "Can I perhaps
give you some advice?"

He leaned back in his chair and lifted his arms in a 'why not' type of
gesture. "Go ahead. I've heard quite a bit over the last Turn, but,
honestly, I've tried to keep this as private as I could. I just don't
know what to do anymore."

One brow arched upwards. "What exactly have you been told, Wirnan?"

He snorted, "To beat her, to sleep with her, to love her, that it
would all work." He snorted again. "Let me tell you. It's _not_
working. I've tried all I can and have reached my wits end. A Turn! A
sharding Turn and I feel as though it's all just a farce. I don't know
what to do anymore."

Karhal snorted. "None of those are really an option right now,
especially if things are tense." He leaned forward slightly and his
voice lowered. "I'll tell you something most don't know. Orhla _hated_
me at first. Our marriage was arranged and she hadn't wanted it, or
me." He frowned slightly at the memory. Bedding her hadn't even been
an option for him. "My first Turn with Orhla was a exercise in
avoidance, dodging dishes, and trying to figure it out how to have
peace in my home. It was a farce in every sense, Wirnan. So I stopped
trying to be her husband." His lips lifted slightly. "I had to become
her friend. Nothing romantic, no expectations. Eventually, she stopped
seeing me as an enemy." His eyes became slightly grieved. "It became a
partnership and we helped each other."

Wirnan frowned and thought over what Karhal had said. "There have been
times when things seemed a bit better, and honestly they were times
when I was able to get through to her. Talk to her. But, we don't talk
now. I _have_ tried, but no matter what it seems she's intent on being
unhappy. She got us into this, and yet won't give things a real try. I
don't know what more to do to become her friend or anything for that
matter. It feels like we're hardly acquaintances right now."

"It won't be better overnight." Karhal stated simply. "If she doesn't
want to speak, even after you try, don't push it. What you can do and
what worked for me, is to tell her kindly that you know things are
difficult right now and there are things about her that you don't
understand just like there are things about you that she may not
understand. But when she's willing and comfortable, you'd like to try
to learn about each other in order to help both of you." He took a
breath. "Not only does it show that you're willing to try, but it
leaves it to her to make the decision. Until she does, be polite,
don't pry and be considerate. It'll happen eventually; it will just
take more patience."

"Thanks Karhal. Though I'm not sure I _want_ it to happen anymore,"
Wirnan sighed with frustration. "Let's just say it's been a _long_
Turn without any relief for certain things." He gave the other man a
look that he hoped he'd understand. "I don't plan to push things in
that department, but I'm at my wits end with it all." He sighed again.
A thought kept niggling at the back of his mind, but it was fuzzy and
he couldn't place it. It was as though the turn in topic made him
_want_ to remember something he'd forgotten. Something related to this
topic. Yet, he couldn't quite figure out what it was. Shaking his head
a bit, he tried to shake off the feeling as well.

"You're a smart man, Wirnan. You'll figure it out." He paused. "Or
Kaya will. Probably when you least expect it. Women are sneaky that
way." His lips curled. "They like to surprise you."

"I just hope by the time we both finally manage to figure things out
that it won't be too late," Wirnan replied. He was already feeling
that they _might_ have crossed just such a point with Turn's End.

"Just one more question, Wirnan." Karhal sat back and looked intently
at the man. "Is she worth it?"

Wirnan frowned. "I don't know Karhal. I really don't. When I first met
her, I thought she was, but then all the trickery and problems." He
let out his breath and shook his head. "I just don't know, but I'm
stuck no matter what." That thought made his frown deepen.

He was. Karhal nodded. "Well, it's up to you whether or not you stay
miserable, my friend, or if you find a way to co-exist. Only you can
decide how you feel."

"We can co-exist, but it doesn't make for a truly happy marriage,"
Wirnan replied with a sad frown.

One brow arched. "Not everyone can achieve that, Wirnan. You know
that. Sometimes...sometimes the best you can hope for is a peaceful
one and perhaps allow something to grow from that."

Last updated on the September 3rd 2013

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All You Can Hope For