Left to Her Own Thoughts
Dragonsfall Weyr
Amber Hills Hold
Vintner Hall
Healer Hall
Hidden Meadows
Dolphin Cove Weyr
Dolphin Hall
Emerald Falls Hold
Harper Hall
Printer Hall
Green Valley Hold
Leeward Lagoon Hold
Barrier Lake Weyr
Sunstone Seahold
Citrus Bay Hold
Writers: Clancey
Date Posted: 24th September 2009
Characters: Felyna
Description: Felyna cares for the children while Erassa and Corowal go to the Weyr, and her mind stays busy contemplating what that may mean.
Location: Emerald Falls Hold
Date: month 5, day 10 of Turn 5
Lost in thought, at best, Felyna returned to the suite she shared with Corowal. It was not until the door shut behind that she allowed her expression to waiver into a frown. Appearances. Appearances. While a frown was an unusual expression on the lovely face, she seemed to pull it off without marring the general beauty of her looks.
Corowal had gone to the Weyr... with Erassa?
The frown deepened.
Her fire lizard Xebex appeared, his blue hide shining and he wrapped himself, chittering, around her arm. He either felt her dismay, or he was hungry. A faint smile as she scratched him, reaching for a treat. Hungry, then.
Felyna would never have made it this far with her "plan" if she had not had a brain to go with her looks. The two were both necessary, and even moreso with someone as intelligent as the current Lord Holder of Emerald Falls.
Several odd things began to click into place in her mind. During her "seduction" of Corowal, she had, of course, known his every move. She had known what he needed often before he needed it, though she had not always filled the need herself. But instead, seen to it that it had been met... whatever the need... Many times she had not needed to intervene, of course. He had a good staff that had looked after him. But she had always been _aware_.
Erassa had been in place for some time and Felyna, in the way of Ladies raised to be set apart, had not paid her much attention as "competition". She liked most everyone, even her "competition", but she had never wished them ill or tried to manipulate them into bad situations. She had simply prided herself on being enough, all on her own, to capture Corowal's interest without manipulation of the other women around him. Only manipulation of _him_. She laughed to herself.
She would rather have won him on her terms than stooping to coarse _tricks_ with the people around him.
And she had.
Besides, he couldn't have _married_ Erassa. A quiet affair, most certainly. It was done far more than the Ladies of her status wanted to admit. At least the ones without her... pragmatism.
Corowal had been strangely resistant since their marriage to move Erassa and her son out of the suite. Even though she'd stated that she didn't want to throw her out and that she just wanted to have their home to themselves. She would be perfectly happy if Erassa and her son moved into a very nice set of rooms right down the hall, if she wanted. When one came available. But in this case, out was far more suitable than in.
It was just not appropriate to _share_ your home with a Foster mother. At least not to Felyna.
Fingers drummed absently along the silk of her dress as she turned to listen to a question from Corolia. As she turned, the frown vanished to her normal good humor as Felyna went to help the young girl. Even with the children, appearances mattered. Perhaps especially with the children.
Yet her thoughts continued to spiral round and round, chasing each other like felines and canines.
While Felyna knew she was quite formidable as both a wife and a bedpartner, she was certainly aware that men, even with a wife like her, found ...interests... elsewhere. She also knew that she was not perfect. Intimate knowledge of her faults, as well as her strengths, was part of her complete awareness of herself, and her position in life, and the steps to take to get to her next goal.
Oddly, it wasn't jealousy that she felt. At least not what most women would describe as that most passionate of emotions.
No, it was something else. A close cousin to jealousy, perhaps.
Combined with her sure knowledge that she was destined for Lady Holder, and her obvious ability to reach that status, was the faint, if unexpected, hope that her husband might, eventually, grow to love her.
But she had not _married_ for love. Who in her station did?
She had, however, allowed herself some rare indulgences with Corowal and was somewhat attached to him. Their minds were a good match for one another and their goals for the future were identical. Love was not something, in spite of those 'sentiments" that she had allowed herself to feel. But... she had hoped. Briefly.
With the skill and surety of long practice, she simply squashed that emotion, and the hope of it.
If it wasn't to be love, then what remained was still what she had married Corowal for... position, security, and status. She would guard her heart more carefully in the future, and revel in the success of her husband and their Hold.
Yet... what was this... emotion? If not jealousy...
She successfully distracted almost all the children with Xebex's antics, and they passed a wonderful time together. Her bond with the children must grow, as her bond with her husband must grow. It would make it easier to accomplish her purpose - staying married - and if she happened to give Corowal more children, kind thoughts of her could only smooth the way for any child of her body.
She did love his children, and she loved caring for them. She had even considered caring for them all the time for the simple joy, but it just wouldn't be ..proper. She sighed over that. It was a shame, really. The children just needed to be loved and it was clear they were very attached to Erassa, though they seemed to like her well enough too.
Her thoughts continued, even her hands and body were busy. She would have to find a way to turn this entire situation to her advantage. And keep her husband happy at the same time.
That was one rule her mother had taught her from the cradle, nearly. And she did it very well, or so she had thought, until today.
Last updated on the September 24th 2009