Can't Let Them Down (Part II)

Writers: AL, Emma
Date Posted: 19th April 2008

Characters: Kitali, M'van
Description: Kitali and the boys go on a picnic with M'van
Location: River Bluff Weyr
Date: month 9, day 7 of Turn 4

The walk had been a pleasant, if silent one - at least, between the two adults. Lidrin had chatted up a storm, letting M'van know all about what he was learning in his harper classes, what he did with Talvan the previous day and that morning, and how many times he had beant little Rethin at ball. Kitali smiled, amused by her son's exuberance, letting him talk out his day.

The weyrlake glittered at them as they arrived, as if welcoming them to their shores. Kitali took out the blanket she had folded from the basket and spread it out, motioning for M'van and the children to take their seats. She, herself, took hers and began to unpack the food, the children reaching out for the cheese and meat almost immediately.

"Did you ask your mother to bring your ball then Lidrin?" asked M'van of the older boy. "I bet she put it in that basket of hers? I think you could persuade her to play catch with us if she did bring it."

"Yeah!" Lidrin jumped up to his feet, his mouth stuffed with cheese.

"Lidrin, chew and swallow before you start yelling out. You're going to spit your food everywhere." Kitali couldn't help but smile at the child's exuberence and she rummaged through the basket until she came out with the ball. "I think you really ought to eat before you begin to play."

"Perhaps your mother is right," suggested M'van gently. "We should all sit down and eat something, and Talvan can tell me what he did today, and your Mama too."

"Ball!" Talvan pointed at the ball before Kitali put it back in the basket. He began to wave his hand, jumping up and down as he sat, his face screwing up as if to cry. Kitali offered him a piece of meat and the boy hesitated, as if uncertain, then took it and shoved it in his mouth. The crisis was averted, for the moment.

"Talvan has been a mess as of late." Kitali gently stroked her youngest son's hair. "He's going through a clingy stage."

"Clingy with you or with everyone?"

"With me. I've been having trouble with him wanting to stay with my cousin while I teach my classes." Kitali took a moment to take a bite of her food, chew it, then swallow before she continued. "He's been throwing temper tantrums, though she says that he calms down after about five to ten minutes."

"He will have to get used to it, and especially when he has to go to classes himself."

"He will." Kitali assured him after swallowing another bite. "It's just a phase. Lidrin went through a similar one at about this age."

"I hope so, imagine if he still did it at age 25!"

Kitali tilted her head back and laughed. "That would be difficult, especially if he impressed."

"Although a dragon might appreciate it at first."

"Maybe." While the adults had been talking, the children had scarfed down their food. Lidrin finished first and jumped up. "Now can we play ball?" Talvan, hearing the word, dropped his cheese and jumped up in mimicry of his brother. "Ball!"

Kitali raised her eybrows at M'van.

"Is that the first time he's said that?"

"No, he said it a few minutes ago, remember? I was just wondering if you were willing to go ahead and play" Kitali reaches into basket and pulls out the ball, handing it to an eager Lidrin. She looks at her sons for a minute, her expression thoughtful. She seems to make a decision, then says softly, "Why don't you go play with Talvan for a bit and let Daddy finish his lunch. He can come play with you after."

"Okay!" Lidrin takes Talvan's hand and, with gentleness, guides him a bit further away so he can teach the younger how to play catch. Kitali watches them for a minute, then turns to M'van. Her mouth twists, as if words are creeping over them and she's trying to decide which ones to use. Finally, she asks softly, "How have you been?" Well, it was better than nothing.

"Working hard, I've been studying for my Mastery."

"Yes, I know." He had been studying for a long time. Kitali had felt rather abandoned at times he had been studying so much. "How do you fare on it?"

"I'm doing well, or so the Weyrdragonhealer says. She thinks that maybe in early in the new turn I might get my knots."

"That sounds great." Kitali looked down at the bit of meat resting upon the bread she held in her hand. She was no longer hungry. "I've missed you." She said after a palpable silence, her voice softer than before.

"Really?"

"Yes, really." The harper looked from bread to meat, brow furrowed.
There was so much she wanted to say. The songs she had tried to write didn't even come close, so how could mere words communicate it? Kitali studied him, as if waiting for something, then looked back down. There was no indication that the feeling was mutual. Perhaps he was too busy with his work.

"But you left, and took the children," it wasn't an accusation, just a statement of fact.

"I needed some time, M'van." Kitali wished he would understand. "And I wasn't about to leave the boys behind."

"What did they think though? It must have upset them to just go like that."

"Yes, it did." Kitali frowned looking up at M'van. "But I think they were more upset by our fighting."

"How about we try to keep that away from them?" he suggested. They at least deserved to see him and their mother be civil to each other.

"I don't want to argue M'van." Kitali admitted. "I'm tired of arguing. And I'm tired..." She stopped, realising she was going to reveal more than, perhaps, M'van was ready for. She looked away to her children, Lidrin gently through the ball to Talvan who tried to catch it, but missed most of the time.

"He'll learn," said M'van following her gaze. "One day he'll surprise us all and catch that ball."

It wasn't what she was thinking about. Kitali's lips thinned into a line and she looked away. "If you're done, I'm sure they would enjoy playing with you."

"Maybe I can show Talvan how to catch."

"Yes, I'm sure that would be fine." Kitali swallowed as she felt her throat tighten. So much for a long, meaningful conversation. It had hardly gone anywhere.

The bluerider had got to his feet, and had crouched down next to his son, arms and hands waiting for Lidrin. "Go on, throw the ball to me and I'll show Talvan about catching it."

Kitali watched as M'van played with the children, heaving a sigh. So much for progress. Still, M'van was at least spending time with the children instead of punish them. That was, at least, something.

Last updated on the May 1st 2008

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Can't Let Them Down (Part II)