Screamscape

Writers: Chelle
Date Posted: 11th August 2016

Characters: Rhosyn
Description: This is what scares a Weyrwoman.
Location: River Bluff Weyr
Date: month 7, day 11 of Turn 8
Notes: Mentioned: Lenala, Lanniya, K'sedel, K'ran, Reeva, N'vanik (not by name)

She stood there, watching as Lenala laid in the bed, groaning. She was obviously in pain and the horror on her face kept Rhosyn very still. There was blood-so much blood. She felt her breaths come quicker, hoping silently that Lenala would live, even though the child might not make it. She needed her and Vilarth. It had been such a risk to have a baby and here they were-reaping the consequences. Her heart twisted as she watched her wingsecond twist and turn in the bed and the healers run around working. And then, in a brief moment-she wasn't standing there watching. She was in the bed.

**Oh Faranth no! I can't, not like this!** The blood was warm and sticky as it came out of her, running down her legs and everywhere. **Where is Reeva? Reeva?** Her head turned and thrashed as she began to scream from the pain and the fear and healers' hands held her down. She became weaker, reaching out in panic for her dragon. Orlaith was there, but she was faint-so faint. She was slipping away. That made her panic worse but it was harder and harder to fight them. They were shouting, but she couldn't understand. The lights were so bright and there was so much noise. And then it went darker and darker.

Her beloved queen was going to panic and /between/. She could see her readying herself to leave, forever lost-to follow her rider. **No, no! The Weyr needs you! Don't come to find me! Stay there!** It didn't matter. Orlaith couldn't hear her anymore. Watching, she saw her beautiful pale golden miracle disappear into the black sky where the moonlight could never again reach her hide. Rhosyn could feel her heart breaking into so many little pieces. There was nothing she could do. Quietly, she mourned her dragon alone.

Then, she was out of the bed. She was in her weyr. K'ran was there. Lenala was there. Glancing upwards to see her wingsecond so suddenly alive, she tried to hear what they were saying. "Lanniya is gone. Anaeryth is gone. No one can find them. Vilarth can't hear them." Her eyes worked to focus on Lenala's mouth. The words came slow. She finally caught on to what she was saying and realized where she was and what had happened. **Shells, she's done it again.** With her heart beating heavily in her chest, she was afraid to ask. "How long has she been gone this time?"

K'ran started to speak, but he only managed two or three words. Then the most dreadful sound started. The dragons of River Bluff had begun to keen. The sound rose, as one-by-one they all joined in, to mourn their fallen queen. Anaeryth and Lanniya were gone-lost forever. She wouldn't listen and now she would never Hear anyone or anything again. Standing up with her fists by her sides clenched, she stumbled towards K'ran. Rhosyn fell towards him. Feeling his arms around her, she shook her head, not knowing what to do. Now they only had two queens again. They were all going to say it was her fault, like everything else. Anaeryth had been Orlaith's daughter-that's where the problem had been. Now the Weyr had no future.

Straightening her back, she couldn't block out the keening. It kept getting louder and louder. And then it wasn't keening anymore. K'ran and Lenala were gone. In their place was Rhosyn's old Weyrwoman. Her face was just as implacable as ever. And the look on it said she knew just how much of a failure her junior goldrider had turned out to be as a Weyrwoman. "You see, you were never going to amount to anything. You were never a Moreta. You and your queen are fit only for clutching eggs." She never stopped, continuing to heap on the insults and Rhosyn could only stand there. Feeling the old feelings of resentment, anger, and despair run through her, she couldn't help but wonder if maybe the woman was right. She had so many more turns of experience. Nothing like that had ever happened to her. And then her face was changing. And it was a man's face. It was K'sedel! "Get out of my sight."

Stepping away to seek the dark confines of the tunnels and the quiet, Rhosyn craved comfort and solace. Inside her mind, she felt Orlaith rumbling angrily. Her dragon wanted to tear the woman apart. She wanted to rend. She wanted to fly! **What? Now?** Cringing as the mating lust swept over her, her whole body shook as she watched Orlaith fly through the clouds. She was magnificent and much more graceful than the males chasing after her. There were many of them, naturally. In the end, though, only one could win. Only one could be her Weyrleader. Turning, Rhosyn felt her arms reach out and touch something solid. Then she fell.

The furs weren't heavy. She pushed them aside, groggy. Stretching her body, she felt the familiar aches and pains. It had been a long, hard night. She was so tired. Yawning, she turned over. Seeing a body there in the bed with her, she remembered. **Really? Could it be? Who is it?** Her hands reached out to turn the head toward her. She wondered if it was K'ran or had Nikornath won this time again? She was very still when she began to trace the lines of the face as it turned towards her. She knew that face. It wasn't young. Still, it was handsome in its way. Scooting back in the bed, she hoped she didn't wake up. Not believing what had happened, she tried to rack her brain. What was she going to do? Twice in a row now, her Weyrleaders had rejected her. In fairness, K'sedel had been weyrmated ahead of time and she hadn't wanted any part of him in that regard. She couldn't handle it again.

Wincing, she closed her eyes and then opened them again. He was still there. Her mind sped along so many thought trails. This wasn't going to work. How could it? It was going to be a disaster. But what if it wasn't? Moving closer, she placed her hand on his chest, feeling the smoothness there. His breath fell and rose evenly. And then his hazel eyes opened and they took her in. For a moment, she saw a flicker. Feeling hope rise up in her chest, she tried to hold it back. Almost starting to smile, she watched as the flicker turned to anger. His face changed as he saw her, realizing what had happened.

Rhosyn's mind went through several scenarios of how to salvage this, but she couldn't hang onto one. Not wanting to upset her dragon who had made the choice, as always, she moved backward on the bed as he moved forward, thrusting her hand away. Rushing to get out of the bed and put his boots on, he started to growl. "How the shells am I supposed to do this? It's hard enough to deal with a Weyr, much less a Weyr and you. You stupid, selfish woman."

Watching him leave, she was quiet and didn't move. She remembered the last leaving. Despite her usual strong facade-with no one there in the mating cots, she didn't try to hold it in. He hated her. This was going to be misery until the next Flight. She couldn't blame Orlaith though. This had all been her doing. Her body shook as the sobs started. And they didn't stop. Choking on one, she made a horrible noise.

~*~

The noise was enough to wake Rhosyn up. Whimpering, the goldrider looked around the dark confines of her weyr. It was quiet and there was no one else in the bedfurs. Orlaith's eyes glowed a worried yellow from where her head was. She couldn't come closer, remaining in her couch area but she had felt her rider's dreams and uneasiness. They hadn't been good ones and she felt the residual fear, loathing, shame, and hurt roll across her rider in waves.

Shaking for a moment and trying to get her bearings, Rhosyn tried to make sure this was reality. The dream had seemed so real, after all. Lying quiet and calming down, she waited to see if anything else happened. She stayed like that for awhile before finally subsiding and going back to sleep.

Last updated on the August 13th 2016

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Screamscape