Don't Let Them Get To You.

Writers: Leigh M-F., Mirren
Date Posted: 12th December 2015

Characters: A'kua, L'rille
Description: The smallest weyrling needs some reassurance. Too bad A'kua's the only one available to give it.
Location: Dragonsfall Weyr
Date: month 3, day 17 of Turn 8
Notes: Mentioned: Talwynn, Nokala, NPC.

A leathery snout poked his cheek, bringing A'kua awake in an instant. His
thoughts had no coherency, but Zeiranth got the message anyway. }:The
littlest rider is crying,:{ he reported.

A'kua squeezed his eyes shut and pinched the bridge of his nose. **Well,
what do you want _me_ to do about it?** he silently asked in exasperation a
moment later.

Zeiranth replied, }:I can talk to his green, and you can talk to him,:{

**You don't like talkin' to greens. They make you want to hide your head
under your wings.**

}:No one else is waking up,:{ the baby bronze insisted. }:Clearly we need
to do _something_.:{

A jumbled stream of profanity issued from A'kua's mind, and he got out of
bed, not bothering to grab a glow or turn on the lights, instead counting
the steps to L'rille's.

L'rille didn't hear anything; his head was under the covers, stifling the
sound. He'd cried every night, after his green was asleep, since he'd
gotten the letter from home. No, home was the wrong word. The place he used
to call home.

"Hey," A'kua said very quietly, pitching his voice so it would only reach
the kid. (Wouldn't Nokala be proud?) "Want me to get someone? Talwynn,
maybe?"

"Nah." L'rille's face appeared as he drew the blanket back and sniffed. "I
don't want anyone to know." Of course anyone included A'kua, but it was too
late for that now.

So much for that idea. The responsibility was truly his. Damn it. A'kua
bent, hand finding the edge of L'rille's cot, and sat next to the other
weyrling's legs. "Is this about your family?"

L'rille shrugged and wiped his face with the blanket. "It's nothing," he
lied.

Without thinking, A'kua put a hand on the lad's shoulder. "People don't cry
over nothin'," he said gently.

The young weyrling opened his mouth to say that his Da would say that his
Ma cried over nothing, but it just made fresh tears roll down his cheeks.
"I miss home," he said between sniffs.

The dark-eyed redhead brushed L'rille's cheeks with surprisingly gentle
fingertips, wiping the tears away. "Several in this class do, I think. Some
are just nastier about it." Like B'drin, although he had calmed down some
after he too started sleeping better.

"And some of us are just wussy," L'rille replied. "I never should have
impressed. She could have chosen so much better." The light touch was
soothing though, like his mother's, only - not.

"You're only sayin' that because you're hurtin'," A'kua chided, but still
gentle. **Zei, what's his green's name?**

}:Ameirith.:{

"Besides, if Ameirith hadn't chosen you, she wouldn't be here now. It had
to be you and no one else. So obviously, she chose you because somewhere in
you is the man who's going to watch the backs of your fellow wingriders.
You just don't know it yet." Ancients, he was being such a hypocrite. He
still thought Zeiranth should have someone chosen someone who was actually
fit to be a leader.

"Nuh-uh," L'rille replied. "She's smart. She would have picked someone
else." His brows furrowed as he tried to follow his own flawed logic. If
she was so smart then why pick him?

A'kua shook his head. "Without you, she would have gone between. So
obviously you were the right choice. You just don't want to believe it
because of what your family's done to you."

"S'not fair," L'rille muttered. "I didn't even know and then… I thought
maybe blue. Or brown." The tears resumed rolling slowly.

"It's not the least bit fair," A'kua agreed, "which is why you should do
your best to become the best rider possible for Ameirith, and show 'em
they're missing out on havin' you as their relative."

"They won't care, they'll only care that I'm… that I… that she's green."
The lad couldn't even say it.

"Then if they-" No! No, he couldn't finish that thought! The philosophy of
**if they don't want me, then fine, I don't need them** had kept A'kua
afloat, but it had also hurt him. He couldn't do that to L'rille because
the kid didn't deserve it. But what else could A'kua say? Damn it, he was
no good at this! For a few tense minutes, he privately raged at Zeiranth
for putting him in this position and at himself for listening to his
dragon.

"I wish I knew what to say to make you feel better," he finally whispered,
"to make you realize just how much you matter to the Weyr. But I don't, and
I'm sorry. I do know you're a good kid, and Ameirith loves you, and you
don't deserve to be treated like garbage by anyone."

L'rille sniffed. "No one does. I'll be all right. I gotta be tougher or we
won't make it." He wasn't going to be the guy who didn't survive
weyrlinghood.

"You can be as tough as you want. Just don't forget you're a good kid too."
A'kua shifted and adjusted the blanket over L'rille's shoulders, smoothing
them down. "Try to go back to sleep. We all have to get up far too soon."

}:You should sing to him,:{ Zeiranth interjected.

**Shells no,** A'kua snapped.

}:Ameirith says he's still unhappy,:{ Zeiranth insisted. }:He needs more.:{

**Stop askin' so much of me!** the redhead mentally shouted. **I'm not the
hero you think I am!**

There was a hurt pause. }:But you're so wonderful,:{ Zeiranth mumbled.

**I'm only human, Zei.** Ancients, he was going to owe the bronze a big
apology and an explanation in the morning. A'kua rested his hand on
L'rille's shoulder again, and started quietly humming something soothing.

L'rille's body stiffened for a moment, then he exhaled and relaxed. It
wasn't long before his breathing became regular and he slipped into sleep.

A'kua very carefully removed himself from the bed and went back to his own,
curling up under the covers with the pillow over his head. He wasn't
looking forward to waking up again. But at least Zeiranth had apparently
forgiven him already, since he rested his head on his rider's hip and fell
asleep as well.

Last updated on the December 14th 2015

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Don't Let Them Get To You.